A Year in Review

As the year draws to a close, we look forward to the renewal and regrowth that will take place during the coming months. Thanks to the help of many, MHI was able to continue our programs throughout the pandemic by moving to a virtual environment for events and for one-on-one mentoring. Take a look at the overview of our year shown below, and catch up on any of the online events you may have missed by reviewing the summaries and videos posted in our blog section.

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Decorate Your Home for Christmas

Photo by Libby Penner on Unsplash

By Eleanora Kukuy

The 2020 holidays are finally almost here! It has been a long year, and despite everything that has happened, we can still celebrate and create cheer, festivity, and joy at home. On Wednesday, December 16th, Tracy Vendetti and Deanna Lober hosted a virtual presentation about sprucing up your home for the holidays. Tracy showed lots of inventive ways you can create a holiday "vignette" arrangement anywhere in your home. Deanna recreated different place settings that can be used for guests, or just for yourself. She also demonstrated how to make chic, creative floral arrangements using ordinary flowers and everyday objects.

Whether you live in a small apartment or a larger house, their tips and tricks can work for any home size and budget and can be adapted for any festive occasion you might be hosting throughout the year. Best of all, you can utilize items around your house to create memorable vignettes, place settings, and floral arrangements. Some hints: You can transform a paper bag into a placemat; odd numbers are more pleasing to the eye than even numbers; snip a branch outside to harmonize a decorative vignette. To learn more, click here to view the video presentations from the event—and start decorating!

As Deanna remarked, "We want to experience beauty in all of our senses." What better way than to begin at home?

Up Your Game: How to Work Smarter and Be More Productive

By Alice Trimmer

We’ve probably all heard about artists and writers who have such passion for their work they forget to eat and sleep—time passes without their being aware of it. We may have experienced something similar ourselves—we are engaged in a discussion of a topic that deeply interests us, and ideas start flying around. Or we are engaged in a piece of writing and suddenly things fall into place and we are off like a rocket.  When this happens, we may be experiencing that coveted state that is called flow—a deep immersion in our work when everything just “comes together” in an engaging and joyful process. But often this is not the case, and we putter around not knowing where to start. Or we suddenly get interrupted after finally beginning a project we have long postponed.  

In a special livestreamed talk for the new MHI mentees, held on November 11, Teresa Carale, president of Murray Hill Institute, shared tips on how to jumpstart the process of flow based on practices recommended by the OptimalWork approach. Developed by Dr. Kevin Majeres, a psychiatrist on the faculty of Harvard Medical School, OptimalWork unites cognitive behavioral psychology and classical virtue theory.   

The three most common obstructions to productive work are: anxiety, feeling overwhelmed, and distractions.  Anxiety can cause us to see obstacles as threats to be avoided for fear of failure or pain. But these obstacles can be re-framed as opportunities for growth. Complaining is a common reaction to anxiety and stress, and it can serve as a major roadblock to growth. If we can recognize the opportunity for growth it puts the situation into a wider context and at the same time enables us to take greater control by moving the challenge within us. This positive shift becomes a gateway to flow. Distractions can be tackled by focusing on one thing at a time, striving to give your full attention to what you are doing. You can think of this as sequential uni-tasking rather than multitasking. If you are interrupted, switch your attention 100% to the person who interrupted you before turning back to your task.   

Teresa had many practical suggestions for organizing the work day, including deciding in advance what is the most important goal or task to be accomplished that day and instituting a “golden hour” to prepare our mind to perform at our best and engage in mindful, focused work that will free us to dedicate ourselves more fully to our highest ideals. If you would like to find out more about the OptimalWork process, view their YouTube Channel: OptimalWork, or visit their website at www.optimalwork.com

Introducing the MHI Mentoring Program

by Eleanora Kukuy

Are you looking for a mentoring opportunity? Murray Hill Institute provides a unique, holistic and tailored mentoring program that explores your career and life aspirations from an ethical standpoint. On Wednesday, September 23rd MHI had a virtual mentoring kick-off event.  Mentors and former mentees spoke about the value they received from this program and how it can support young professional women.  

The women who make up MHI's board and mentoring program come from various professional backgrounds. Stephanie Petrillo, one of the hosts of the session, comes from the information technology background. She works for the City of New York and is one of the MHI mentors. Teresa Carale is the president of MHI and has a doctorate in chemical engineering. She spoke about the mission of the Institute: "MHI is a leadership institute for women that fosters effective, ethical, person-centered leadership...We convert our dreams into reality through hard, honest work." The mentoring program helps to turn participants' theories into "concrete situations in life." The MHI mentoring program will celebrate its 10-year anniversary in January 2021. The first group of mentees started in 2011, and the program was an instant success. 

Elzbieta Napierala, the current director of the mentoring program, described how it works. Each mentee is matched with a mentor after their application is reviewed. It usually takes a few weeks to get matched. The pairing is based on professional circumstances and the mentee's goals for the program. For example: Do you want to make a career transition? Do you want to take your current career further? Do you want to establish greater work/life balance? Your entire application is evaluated, not just your career aspirations, to ensure a custom mentoring experience. The program is broken down into 8 monthly meetings between the mentor and mentee. Suggested topics for each meeting are listed on the website, with recommended online reading available to help you prepare for each meeting.  You will work on goals, check in on your overall progress, and make changes if necessary. Topics range anywhere from goal setting to leadership, but these are not cast in stone: you are encouraged to discuss anything that relates to your current situations or bring up any questions you may have.  

Since the spring of 2020, the program has been run virtually, with mentors and mentees meeting via phone or an online platform such as Zoom. This has made it possible to accept women from outside the NYC area. Applying to the program is simple. Click the link below to read more about the program and access the application.   

The program fee of $100 includes mentoring and access to online materials.

The mentors are a group of accomplished women from various fields. Three of them shared their experiences during the mentoring event  and spoke about their careers and mentoring experiences: 

Grace Perry

• One of the founding partners of the program, current mentor and MHI board member.

• Her background is in global HR with a specific focus in development, compensation and benefits on a global basis.

• She has worked with Fortune 100 companies around the world.

• "We are looking into a more virtual world and workplace” and it helps to keep changing and transforming the program to keep it relevant.

• Emphasized that the mentoring program is holistic with a focus on ethical, humanistic values and behaviors. 

Maria Amelia Salerno

• Was a Career counselor in a Barcelona business school for 30 years.

• Spoke about her numerous experiences with mentoring her former students at the business program.

• Currently with MHI as a mentor.

• For her, mentoring means "providing a safe environment for a mentee to express herself very safely and where we as mentors actively listen, and not be judgmental, [one where we are] very empathetic, honest and ethical." 

Paula Caravelli

• Background in the fine arts and art history.

• Currently an architectural interior designer; she spoke about her accomplishments in the industry and the women who supported her along the way.

• She had many great mentors and now wants to give back to young women who are considering a career in the arts.  

• "We are women helping other women." 

Former mentees also shared their takeaways from the program:

Alejandra 

• Her initial goal was to transition from retail to corporate. Her mentor supported her with getting her dream office job.

• "This is a strong support system; your mentors are from different industries who will help with [so much.]"

• "I learned a lot about myself." 

• Found great value with her mentor.

Cui Xia

• Senior consultant at Ernst and Young. 

• Joined MHI while transitioning to her current employer.

• For her, this was not just a mentorship experience but also the opportunity to meet women from different industries. 

• Her advice: Voice your concerns and goals at the onset of your career. Be proactive, and be aggressive with networking. 

• At Ernst and Young, she has been given an opportunity to give back by pairing up with and supporting rising high school seniors with college and SAT questions. 

Maddalena

• Decorative painter, applicator of wool finishes. Her field encompasses both design and construction. 

• "MHI chooses carefully the mentor who can match your expectations and needs... who gives you honest advice and feedback."

• Related her experience: "My mentor guided me to step back from good quality production that I already had, to present myself and my services to the marketplace in an effective way." 

• Expresses that there is no other mentoring like this in NYC that's so well done at this price.

• Urges prospective mentees: "Let’s go for it!"

To learn more about the Murray Hill Institute mentorship program, follow this link.

To view the kickoff session, click here. 

Leading Through Social Media

by Alice Trimmer

How can we make our time on social media count? This was the theme of Katy Hinderer’s thought-provoking talk and discussion given on October 28, 2020. Katy, a social media influencer by profession, started by explaining just what that means. She works with brands and companies to have an impact on the decisions of others. While this can potentially be manipulative, it can also be a service. In fact, we are all influencers in some way. We recommend a restaurant where we enjoyed a meal or a new performing group we just discovered. Whether we do this on social media or through face-to-face conversations, our opinion counts. If the product or service is a good one, we naturally want to share that information. Whether we use social media primarily to engage up with friends and family, to share a hobby or skill, or to send updates to clients or customers, it is more than likely a big part of our lives, and one that most of us could profit from approaching with more intentionality.    

Katy shared her PACT system for making the most of her social media presence. PACT stands for Purpose, Authenticity, Community, and Time. Starting with Purpose, we should ask ourselves two questions: Why do I have this app (e.g. Facebook, Pinterest) and how do I actually use it? It is worth digging into these questions because we can easily get in the habit of using social media apps to procrastinate or waste time, or to post content without really asking ourselves whether there is a good reason for doing so. If we find that an app no longer serves any useful purpose, we can just delete it.   

The basis of Authenticity is to be true to one’s self. It is all too easy to present ourselves on social media as someone other than who we really are. We can also fall into the trap of comparing ourselves to others (even relative strangers) and feeling a need to present ourselves in a certain way that might have little to do with our actual self. Katy recommended deleting or muting accounts that leave you not feeling “good enough.”       

We can easily appreciate the advantages of connecting as a Community through social media, with its rapid two-way communication. Social media apps are great tools for human connection but they can also become highly divisive. We can ask ourselves, before creating or sharing posts: Is this true? Does it need to be shared? Is it unkind or hurtful to anyone? Apps are the result of technology, but we can never forget that there are real persons on the other side reading and being affected by our posts. 

The last aspect of PACT is Time. People tend to vastly underestimate the time that they spend on social media. The teams that develop apps specifically design them in ways that keep their users engaged, but  there are ways to control technology from eating up too much of our time by, for example, turning off notifications or setting screen time limits.  

Katy dug into each of these areas with great depth and a wealth of personal experience. If you missed her session or would like to review it, it is posted here.

With a Financial System So Drastically Shifting, What Can We Do about Money?

By Eleanora Kukuy 

Financial planning is a common concern for many people, especially during a pandemic. Some of us have been laid off, furloughed, or had our salaries cut; and many of us are simply budgeting and planning during an uncertain time. On Wednesday evening of July 15th, MHI guests were invited to listen to a presentation led by Arisleyda Riehl, Vice President at Merrill Lynch Wealth Management. Arisleyda covered a number of relevant topics that spanned budgeting, saving, inflation, and more. Here are some of the key takeaways:

• Budgeting is your friend: "You need to have a handle on what's coming in and coming out in order to see where you can cut expenses”

The first step of financial planning is budgeting, which should be done regardless of income level. If you do not budget yet, start right away! Grab a pad and pen and start by writing or typing all your expenses and then continue to do it every day. Over time, you will see where your expenses can be trimmed. Some questions you can ask yourself: "Do I need that unlimited data plan if I'm staying home more often and have a reliable internet? Can I cancel that gym membership if I'm not going every day?" It all depends on everyone's unique lifestyle. 

• Create ways to save money; Unsubscribe from your favorite retailers!

Arisleyda summarized it best when she said, "We're in a land of consumerism." Consequently, the average American has $10-12,000 in debt. We are always surrounded by money-draining temptations. Protect your budget by eliminating situations where you may be tempted to spend. Some money-saving tips: Try unsubscribing from some of your favorite retailers to avoid getting tempting emails promoting sales. Delete store credit card data from websites where you shop often, to make it harder to purchase something next time you go online. Open a separate savings account where you can put money away without seeing it.

• The golden rule is to save at least 3 months of your expenses 

How much money should you save up? Arisleyda's golden rule is to save at least 3 months of your average living expenses. Use your budget to calculate how much you pay for all your living expenses per month, and then multiply that by 3. That's the ideal minimum amount you want to have saved up. It is highly advisable to start an emergency fund, which is money that you set aside for unexpected expenses. These could be a "rainy day, an unexpected costly repair or needed purchase, or a special event. When you have money set aside, you can be well prepared to meet these needs. 

• Never ever take money from your 401k! 

"There are numerical reasons not to touch that," Arisleyda warned. Taking even a little bit of money from your retirement account can cause severe tax consequences.  

• Make sure you put money away on a regular basis, and that your savings grow each year to account for inflation.  

For example, the current inflation rate is 2.4%. That means that in 10-20 years, the prices of goods are going to be 2.4 times more expensive. In this case, grow your money at least 2.4% each year, and try to exceed it. Arisleyda gave an excellent figurative example of what happens if you put away a dollar under "a pillow" and take it out 20 years later. If you are satisfied to still have that dollar 20 years later, think again ̶ you're at a major loss. That dollar is worth less now, and you're not able to buy as much for it. Therefore, simply putting away cash does nothing to grow your savings.   

• Financial wealth is created with compounding ̶ as long as you don't touch your money!

The compounding effect means earning a percent on your money each year. Each year, if you leave that money to collect interest, the compounding effect increases. It was illustrated with a graph that compared three people who invest the same amount of money into their investment accounts each month. Naturally, the person who starts saving earlier, over a period of 40 years, ends up with far more money at the end of the same time period, because her money compounded each year. Make sure you do not take money out of your savings account, as it disrupts the compounding process.

• Case Studies of Two Households: Main lessons learned

We examined two different fictional households that were struck with unemployment during the pandemic. Each household is going through unemployment ̶ a 30-year-old single man, and a middle-aged couple. We examined the lessons learned from these two scenarios:

- Avoid dipping into your retirement plan
-  Budget appropriately (such as shifting vacation budget to  essentials)
- Cut expenses wherever you can
- Do not hesitate to call your cell phone provider, car insurance, and credit card companies to ask for lower fees and less interest rates: every saved dollar helps!

We all have goals which we may need to plan financially for. Some of us want to buy or lease a new car or house; some of us want to plan a wedding or another big event in our life. Start planning and calculating costs in advance. Continually save and invest your money. And most importantly, avoid financial scams and dipping into your retirement savings account.

A video of the presentation is here.  

Arisleyda has kindly shared some printable worksheets and information to help us get started:  

Expense Worksheet

Goal Worksheet

Tips for Managing Your Finances Today and Tomorrow (including case histories)

For more information, visit Arisleyda’s website.

Creating a Results-Driven Resume

by Eleanora Kukuy

Updating our resumes may seem like a chore, but it is ever more important to maintain a fresh resume in light of the unsteady work environment caused by the pandemic. There are many components that go into making an effective resume: drafting your summary and job history, editing, proofreading, and most importantly, making sure that your resume stands out in a sea of others. On Thursday August 13th, MHI participants had an opportunity to engage in Susan Trammell's workshop "Creating a Results-Driven Resume." Susan shared useful insights about the art of creating a resume that matches your unique skills and experience to the advertised job description.   

Susan began the session by asking us to analyze a flashy NYC beer hall advertisement. The advertisement illustrated the importance of appealing to what the onlooker wants (e.g. a fun time), rather than merely listing out what the beer hall provides (e.g. food, beer). For our purposes, the onlooker represents the hiring manager. Susan asked us to consider how our skills can help to solve problems for the company. You could answer that by sharing about what you've already accomplished in your work experience. "Be benefit-driven. Link the action with the result," she recommends. A good way to tackle your industry's needs starts with research; look up multiple job postings within the industry you are applying for. Most likely, they have similar keywords, or "pain points," that indicate what the hiring managers are really looking for. Group these words into categories. For example, under project management you might group words such as project leader, set agendas, follow-up, budgeting. Select from these and adapt the wording to fit your experience. In that way, you are tailoring your resume to demonstrate that are a candidate that can really benefit the company.  Susan summarized her message by quoting, "It's not all about what you've done. It's what you can deliver to the new job."   

Moreover, every little detail matters in a resume. Susan discussed tips for "putting it all together:" the wording, the font, the layout, type size, and more. She even shared her own resume to walk through the examples. Once your resume is ready, your method of sending it may require thought as well. Susan's tip: Although LinkedIn is an excellent source of information, avoid applying on LinkedIn and opt to reach out directly through your chosen company's website. In this way you will avoid applying for out-of-date jobs and will also demonstrate more interest in the company. Participants in the workshop received answers to a wide range of questions: Do you put your college degree at the top or bottom of the resume? Do you send it in PDF or Word format? What if your dream company doesn't have available positions, but you still want to send in your resume? Do you update the resume for every job application?  

Whether we are actively job hunting or stable in our current positions, it never hurts to update our resumes or skim through them to make sure they are up-to-date and as effective as they could be. Susan's workshop provided helpful, up-to-date, and tactical advice that can be applied to any profession and level of experience. 

Music of Hope

By Eleonora Kukuy

On Wednesday, June 24th, MHI had the opportunity to host a fireside chat with Mayu Saeki, moderated by Jenny Chen, a MHI board member. Guests tuned in from diverse locales such as Westchester, Brooklyn, and as far away as south Florida and even Germany. In our chat, Mayu gave us thoughtful insights about her career, personal life, important influences, and new album, “HOPE.” She also gifted us with some musical performances.

Mayu is a talented musician who plays the piano and flute.  She has experience in classical, jazz, pop, rock, and even Celtic music. “Music was naturally my life” she explains of her early life, citing her music-loving father as an important influence. Ever since she started playing the piano at the age of 3, Mayu’s life has been filled with diverse musical experiences and accomplishments. From performing at opera and symphonies in Hiroshima to pop music in Tokyo to playing with NYC jazz bands to working with an off-Broadway production of Fiddler on the Roof to touring with a Celtic music band, Mayu has had an incredibly varied and enriching musical career.

One of Mayu’s biggest accomplishments, however, is the recent release of her very own album, “HOPE.” It is a compilation of some of her finest work. “When I play my music, I can [communicate] more than when I’m speaking,” she described in the chat. She vividly demonstrated her musical language by playing one of the compositions from her album on flute, as well as one of her favorite piano compositions that she learned as a child.  Mayu reflects, “Music has always been a best friend by my side, giving me hope, and I wanted to give hope to the world through my music.”

Mayu attributes her success to her mentor and friend, Chico Hamilton, an NEA jazz master. She met him after she arrived in NYC and worked with him on three of his albums. He was her mentor until his passing in 2013. “He was more than music” she said in reference to her relationship with the musician. Mayu describes that he treated his hired musicians like "sons and daughters," welcoming everyone into his home for weekly rehearsals and chili dinners. Since his death, his students still correspond and keep his legacy and memory alive. From Chico, Mayu learned to be fearless of mistakes and as a result was able to break through her limits.

In addition, Mayu reflects on taking multiple risks throughout her career which have paid off. Despite some family pressure, cultural barriers after moving to the USA in 2009, and difficult language transitions, Mayu’s resilience and determination ultimately led her to success. “Just take a risk” she implored in our conversation. This golden advice can certainly apply to any career. Her advice for other hopeful musicians is, “Whatever instrument you like, go for it. Music is wonderful.” 

Throughout the fireside chat, Mayu impressed us with her humbleness and sincerity. She is a reminder that with resilience and hope, we can realize our dreams and overcome any obstacle thrown at us along the way. 

Like many other artists, Mayu has been impacted by the coronavirus pandemic by having to figure out ways to monetize her craft from home. She urges us to support artists by buying their albums online, registering for virtual music lessons, and donating to livestream concerts. 

Please find Mayu’s album here and see our video for the full Fireside Chat and Mayu's performances.

KonMari for a Simple Life: A Virtual Seminar

The drawer we can no longer bear to look at, the cabinet door that emits fallen objects when we open it, the bag of questionable items we threw into our closet when unexpected guests dropped over…Now that many of us have had much more time at home, these mystery places have been calling out to us to get cleaned up. But so often when we start clearing out, we don’t finish, because the decision-making process becomes overwhelming. Ann Dooley, certified KonMari Organizing Consultant, treated us to a delightful seminar on how this process can be turned into a positive one that enables us to experience the freedom of letting go. She explained, using her own life experiences as an example, how our ingrained relationship to the objects around us can have an impact on what—and how much—surrounds us. She gave us thoughtful and action-oriented suggestions for organizing our belongings and sorting them by types—for example, clothing, books, sentimental items—rather than tackling a space room by room. This enables us to evaluate each category of possessions as a whole rather than discovering an unexpected cache of items belonging to a type we have already gone through.  

For many who attended the seminar, this approach was a revelation and brought home many of the benefits of putting the time and effort needed to organize our belongings and let go of those that no longer have a place in our lives. This clearly has benefits not only for our own peace of mind but also the serenity and peace of others who live in and visit our homes. Our thanks to Ann for making our first virtual seminar such a success and for giving us renewed motivation to tidy up! 

If you missed the seminar, or would like to review some of Ann’s points, she has kindly given us permission to share her talk. You can also visit Ann’s website: www.simplejoywithann.com or follow her on Instagram or Facebook @simplejoywithann.  

Founding Anagrassia

By Mary Grace Godfrey 

Mary Grace, one of our collaborators for MHI Fashion Week, shares for our readers the story of how her passion for beauty resulted in the creation of her own fashion brand.

It seems that every child is asked, “Who do you want to be when you grow up?” While most take this as a nice thought-provoking question, I took it to heart and began to build a vision in my head of who I wanted to be and what I wanted to do. I have always known that I wanted to create beautiful pieces and tell stories about them. 

I grew up in an artistic family, where the arts were taught and nurtured. I have early memories of making all sorts of friendship bracelets with my sisters and selling them at our neighborhood swimming pool. We bought big fishing tackle boxes and filled them with our DMC thread, pins, yarn and finished bracelets. During the regular top-of-the-hour pool breaks, we worked on our bracelets and sold the finished ones. And since we were competitive, we pushed each other to work faster and create more elaborate designs. 

Friendship bracelets eventually included sterling silver and glass jewelry in later years. While in high school, I became intrigued with the wide variety of textile choices available in stores and enrolled in sewing classes at a local fabric shop. I couldn’t afford the classes on my own, but my negotiations with my dad were successful and he helped me pay for this extracurricular activity. Even though in my heart I knew that sewing classes were good for me, I couldn’t bring myself to tell my friends and coaches. I thought they might belittle my choice to learn a skill that has so little interest in today’s world.

I stopped sewing in college. I was a Division 1 swimmer and my workload in class and in the pool were demanding. I didn’t dig out my sewing machine again until I had completely finished competitive swimming my senior year of college. It was at this point that I realized I had lost track of my passions and talents and that I needed to return to them and find a career and life in the world of design and storytelling.

Since then I received formal sewing training at a variety of universities and worked in costume and tailor shops. I started Anagrassia as a hobby while working for an estate planning law firm. In 2013, the hobby became a business that really took off when I made bridal separates for my sister and best friend and then posted their photos and stories online. (This was before wedding separates were widely available on the market.) Since then, I have created and sold thousands of custom-made garments worldwide. 

The name Anagrassia comes from my Ukrainian heritage. It is a combination of my sister’s name, Anastassia, and my middle name, Grace. My Ukrainian grandmother was a professional seamstress and my first teacher. She made my sisters and I promise to pass on the Ukrainian arts and traditions to our children and others. 

Running a small business is a lot of work, but the rewards are great. The most rewarding part about my job is that I can create the environment I work in. My workspace is wonderful and happy. I am fortunate that I can decline work from difficult or unkind people and only work with honest textile companies. This is not only healthy for me, but it will be important when I start a family of my own. Like most working women, my work spills into all aspects of my life and sets the tone of my household.

I believe if you follow your calling, talents, and passions, you will ultimately find yourself working in your dream job whether or not you have held onto it since your childhood. I never set out to own a successful custom clothing business, but my core desires brought me here. Despite the rough days and living a life much different from that of my peers, I continue to get up each day and continue trying to grow because I can’t shake off my God-given talents, nor do I want to. Perhaps it is my calling to create things in order to make our world more beautiful!

I am thrilled to help Murray Hill Institute with the upcoming MHI Fashion Week. We will have a variety of speakers, classes, and events lined up for the week-long fashion program. There is so much I wish I had known before I started my business. Undoubtedly, the students will walk away from this course with a valuable head-start in pursuing their dreams with lots of inspiration, information, skills and friends. I am excited to be a part of Fashion Week and I look forward to meeting the students and spending an afternoon teaching!